Hello~
How are you today?
So you made that New Year’s Resolution, you know the one to lose weight.
How is that going for you? If you have lost anything at all, congratulate yourself. Did you meet your goal? Have you quit trying?
How many of you right now want to lose weight?
Well, frankly, you don’t want to lose weight. Losing weight is a vehicle to an end goal.
Your end goal may be to fit into a smaller pair of jeans, lower your cholesterol, lower you blood pressure or look sexier. Those things are benefits of losing weight.
So what do you want?
Well, frankly, without more information from you, I don’t know. It is different for everyone. But the reason is one of four survival needs.
Mike
I want to share Mike’s story. Mike wanted to get into his own fitness business. Mike wanted to lose 23 pounds before going into his own fitness business. He wanted to be a good example. He would lose a pound here and a pound there then gain some back. You know the cycle, right? The weight went up, the weight went down. Ever happen to you?
Mike, what do you want to change? My weight. Well, with a few questions, what was really going on with Mike was excess weight was filling the need for significance. Being just 23 pounds over his ideal weight, gave Mike certainty.
What was being met by not changing? Losing weight would bring uncertainty to his life. Losing weight was an excuse to not succeed which also would be uncertainty. We avoid doing something (lose weight)as there is a concern that doing that thing (lose weight) we will not continue to meet the need we have which is being met, in this case the need for significance. This is why people get stuck in transforming their lives.
Quitting his efforts to lose weight created certainty. He was certain he could not lose weight. This led to apathy which provided certainty and significance. He was in control of his body. It was his decision.
People get “addicted” to how they are meeting that need. Addiction gets in the way. Addiction is a habit. When addiction stops meeting your need, you will quit your addiction. In this case, not losing weight.
What to do? Find a new action to meet your need in a positive way.
With a few more questions, an action plan was made.
When you make that switch from meeting a need from a lower level to a higher one, you feel so great. Your whole persona changes.
So, there you have it. I hope that now you understand that no one really wants to lose weight. We do want to lose that old way of meeting a need, and trade it in for a new and improved way of meeting that need.
Until next time, take care.
If you have a need you would like to meet in a more positive way, or would simply like to understand what motivates you, let me know. I can be messaged at
www.facebook.com/lisylifecoach or my web site is www.lisaycoaching.com
Yeah!
Smile for me!
Lisa Y., life coach
