Catch up or play

Hey boss~

How are you?

Life is a marathon

So, here is the question. If you were running a 10k and were 1k behind everyone else, would you run harder to try to catch up or would you stop to play hop scotch?

Well, I guess it depends on a few things:

Are you tired? If you are tired of running, you may want to stop and rest a bit.

Are you young or old? If you are older, you may want to take a rest. If you are younger, you may want to catch up.

Are you competitive? If you are competitive and want to be your best, you should try to catch up. You may also want to try to win.

Finishing is not always enough

If you are running this marathon because you are improving your lifestyle, and it is a challenge, then finishing is a great thing. Good for you!

But if you are a seasoned runner, if you have finished other races, then just finishing is not enough. You need to catch up. You need to not play hop scotch. You need to make that effort to at least finish with the pack. You don’t want to finish 1k behind the pack.

Reward

The reward is pride of achievement. The good feeling you have being good at something. I can’t think of a better feeling than going from behind to being at the finish line even a bit ahead of time.

Respect is another reward of catching up. When you catch up, the crowd really roars. You are an exceptional person when you go from last place to finishing with the pack. 

Be exceptional. You will be a better person.

Yeah!

Smile for me.

Lisa Y. coaching

www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

Self-mastery class lesson one

Hey Boss~

How are you?

My purpose: To fill the world with men and women living large with lives filled with passion, purpose and boldness. 

Solving problems

The first way I want to accomplish this purpose is to help people solve their problems. This can be through helping them diagnose their inner drives and making a plan for change. Or it can be to help them with making decisions, work through relationship issues, give them a nudge, or listen.

Self-mastery course

The second way I want to accomplish this purpose it to inspire. I want to start a new series of posts I call the self-mastery course. To help people find a meaningful, fulfilling, and worthwhile life.

As we live on Earth, we struggle within. We all have some burning desires. We all want to have meaning in our lives. We want a purpose. If we think we are not doing these things, we feel incomplete.

Let’s get started. 

Introduction

There is a oneness of the universe. We are all connected. This includes all living beings. From the tiniest ant, to dogs, cats, humans, and plants. The spirit of the universe is in all of us equally. None of us is greater than another. We are different. We have different roles, but we all are vital. We all reflect the light of the world.

To live spiritually is to want joy for all. It is to care about others. It is to see a need and to fill it as a natural reflex. It is to see the pain in the world and to want to do your part,  no matter how small, to make things better.

It is my philosophy that we should simply focus on our own part of the world. Make your own neighborhood a better place. Lend a hand to your neighbors. Lend a hand to your family and friends. If we all did this, the world would take care of itself. Think about it. The world is just a huge net work of neighborhoods. We don’t have to take care of the world. We only need to take care of our own neighborhood.

Spiritual evolution

We are spiritual beings at our core. It seems to me that as children we have this natural spiritual way about us. As we get older, something happens and we lose our innocence, and some where down the road of life we try to find it again.

If we pay attention to children and animals, we can see that natural, pure goodness, and we long for it. This is our spiritual evolution.

As adults, we become pulled in different directions. We get overwhelmed with fulfilling the needs for home, food, clothing and other things on one side and fulfilling the need for love, joy, fulfillment on the other. There never seems to be enough hours in the day for it all. We prioritize. After we take care of the things we have to take care of to provide for our physical needs we are often too tired to work on the spiritual or don’t have as much time for it as we would like.

Spiritual evolution has to do with bringing these two sides back together. One thing to do is to practice mindfulness. This brings awareness. This is the awareness of our self and the world around us. What brings joy, and what brings pain. As we become more aware, our minds create unity. We are no longer divided in our spiritual life and the mind becomes at peace. As we evolve, we become more and more selfless. We practice kindness as a natural reflex.

Lesson One: The war within

The war within is self-mastery.  It is to become spiritually aware. How are we building up people and how are we knocking them down?

The war within is taking care of our needs on one side and caring about the needs of others on the other. What we have lost is the understanding that spiritual unity is the glue that holds society together. Without spiritual unity, we have chaos.

 It is our moral duty to fight the good cause of spiritual unity.  It is our moral duty to grow our own spiritual evolution to grow the spirit of kindness and consideration for all, humans, animals and mother Earth.

OK. that is enough for today.

Smile for me.

Lisa Y. life coach

www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

Getting to know each other

Hey boss~

How are you today?

I hope all is well.

Let’s get personal

me

Passionate. If I were to sum myself up in one word, I would say passionate. I am passionate about all living things. I care about bugs. I care about plants. I care about bodies of water. I care about the desert. I care about the mountains. I care about the forests.  I care about people.

Don’t you think that is nice? Come on. I care about bugs. OK I will admit I am not fond of all bugs. I am not fond of fleas, ticks, or mosquitoes, but only the ones that would bother me and my dogs. Roaches, I almost forgot about roaches. I don’t want them around. If I care about bugs, think how much I care about people.

Fascinated. I am fascinated about most anything. I am fascinated about how things work. I am fascinated about the history of things. I am fascinated about why people do the things they do. I am fascinated about human relations. I am fascinated about word meanings and their history.

Curious. I am curious about what makes people tick. I am curious about why people do the things they do. I am curious as to why my dogs bark at one thing and not another. I am curious as to why some people post on Facebook often and some almost never. (I like to post, but take a break sometimes because I don’t want to bore my boring friends) I am curious as to why others are not more curious or fascinated or passionate.

Getting to know you

You are __________. Well, only you can answer that.

I can say is that I am curious as to why you are here. What would you like to know more about?

Know it all I forgot this one. I am opinionated. I sort of have an opinion about everything. So, if you want an opinion about something, anything, let me know. You can like my business Facebook page and post there which would be great. Or you can go to my personal Facebook and become my friend. Post something you would like an opinion about, and you can count on me to give an opinion.

One rule. NO POLITICS. It is a very bad subject.

You…back to you. I want to know about you.

I can be messaged here: www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach or if you want my personal  Facebook it is: www.facebook.com/lyerington

Yeah!

Smile for me!

Lisa Y coaching.

That is another thing. If you want to know more about my coaching, www.lisaycoaching.com  (But I think it is better to get to know me on Facebook)

Sally

Hey Boss!

How are you?

One person a week

So, on 10/8/16 I made it my goal to help one person a week. Not just talk, but help. So far so good.

Sally

So I want to tell you about that one person. She knows I am writing about her right now in case you are wondering, and she is fine with it. For the last few weeks, Sally has been very sad and tormented over the holidays. Should she get together with the “family” or not? She is invited to Thanksgiving and Christmas with her brother in laws family. She does not know them. She feels she “should” go. But, she really does not want to go. Why?

Well, she is very shy. She does not socialize very well. She is concerned that she will feel very tense the whole time. It would be a long drive, and really not worth the trip to be with people she does not even know.

The torment comes from not wanting to go on one side and feeling she “should” on the other.

Shoulds: She does not want to hurt anyone’s feelings. She does not want to hurt the feelings of the people hosting the dinners. She does not want to disappoint her sister. And she does not want to be a “party pooper”.

Not wanting to go: But if she goes then she is not being true to her self.

How I helped

This may not sound like much of a success story. Here is how it is. You see, Sally was going through a lot of very bad feelings. Indecision is a very hard situation. Not making the decision is what makes us crazy.  You know what you want to do. But sometimes there is pressure to do one thing when you want to do another.

I got Sally to relax. She got all of her unsorted thoughts out. Then the question, do you want to go? The answer… no. Then came the “buts”. No buts! Then comes the assurance that it is OK to not go.

Sometimes what people really need is to simply be assured that what they want to do is OK.

The Holidays

For Sally, the holidays are to be spent quietly at home. That may not seem like fun or festive to you. It may seem sad to you. But it is what Sally wants. She wants to be at home in peace rather than with people she does not know feeling socially awkward and tense.

Helping Sally to make that decision and to feel good about it to me is a win.

I hope that all of you have the holiday season that makes you happy.

Indecisive?

Do you have something that you are debating? Are you torn? If you want help, you know where to find me. www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach to leave a message.

For more on my coaching, www.lisaycoaching.com

Yeah!

Smile for me!

Lisa Y

 

Community unity.

Hey Boss!

How are you today?

Tragedy unifies

So something bad happened and people are coming together. That is a great thing. There was a flood. There was a fire. There was an earthquake. There was a terrible car crash. There was a bombing. There was an airplane crash. When these things and more happen, it always brings us together. We get this feeling of community. We forget about all the silly little things and focus on being there for other people.  Which is great.

Unity all the time

What about the good times? Where is that sense of community in the good times? Let us come together just to come together. We are the same people in good times and bad. If you see a need, help. Don’t limit your self to only helping in times of tragedy. That old lady or man do they need help? The man pushing his motorcycle down the road. The friend who struggles to do something on the computer and needs help. The person who has their arms full and drops something. The single woman struggling to move something heavy.

Can you tell that that stranger is sad? Can you tell that stranger is angry? Can you tell they are struggling in some way? Maybe they just lost a loved one. Maybe they are sick. Maybe they hurt?

I know we are all busy. But really is it hard to do one nice thing even once a month? It feels good. You do that act of kindness you will smile all day.

Compassion.

All I am suggesting is that we show compassion all the time. Maybe that person you saw with their head on the table at the restaurant is sad. Maybe that person who looked away at the gym is barely hanging on. You don’t have to do much. Smile, nod and say take care. For the more daring, ask them if they are OK. Or ask them if they need a hug. You may just be surprised. But don’t be pushy. If someone wants to be alone, just say OK, and wish them well. Your simple act of kindness by showing interest, may have made a big impact on their life. You told them “you are not alone”.

Tell me what you think. I would love to hear from you.

www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

Smile for me.

Yeah!

Lisa Y coaching

Why won’t anyone help me?

Hey~

How are you today?

Deaf ears

Do you ever reach out to your friends and get little if any response? Do you ever get baffled by the lack of response? It is not so unusual for people to try to get help from the people they know to just be ignored. Ignored.

Why won’t anyone help me?

The reason you don’t get a lot of support can be for various reasons. It may be the help you need. That is, maybe they don’t know how to help you.  It may be that you ask too often. It may be that they don’t understand you are asking for help. Or, it can be any number of things.

You still need help

If you are not getting the help you need, you still need help. Quite often you just need someone to listen. When you talk through an issue, it often sorts itself out. Then a plan can be made. You can either make a plan on how you can make things better by yourself or how to get the help you need.

Don’t be alone

Things are rarely as bad as they seem. They just seem worse than they are because you are thinking about it too much. When you have something that is bothering you, you may dwell on it. When you do that, you make it grow. The worst case scenario starts to build in your mind.

Don’t be alone. There are two options to not being alone. One, pick one person you think is the best to turn to, and make that person listen. Just listen. Make sure that you really need to be heard.  Two, if you  have no one that will step up and listen, then you have to find someone who will. There are professional listeners out there. Life coaches are such people.

Life coaches are thinking partners. They listen. They question. They guide you to the core of the issue and then to the answer.

It would be my pleasure.

It would be my pleasure to listen. But, if not me, then find someone. But my advice is to find someone that keeps it simple. If someone wants to complicate things, that is not helpful. Don’t be with someone who turns molehills into mountains. Find someone who will turn that mountain into a molehill.

If you would like to leave me a message: www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

Yeah!

Smile for me.

Lisa Y coaching.

Give yourself permission

Hey Boss!

How are you?

Transforming your life in three steps.

Most of us want to change something in our lives. We seem to never be quite happy. It could be a new career. It could be a relationship. It could be your body, hair or face. It could be all sorts of things.

I think there are three steps toward change.

Diagnosis, what do you really want to change? There is a difference between what you want to change and what the benefit of that change is.

Plan, how are you going to make that change? How are you going to meet your goals on a higher level?

Hypnosis, work on the sub conscious level.

Hypnosis

I started my study and use of hypnosis at least 10 years ago. I stopped using it, but I recently started up again, and I love it.

I am not talking about the sort of hypnosis where someone makes you quack like a duck or sing in front of a crowd of people. Who would do that?

What I am talking about is using the power of the subconscious mind. Some of the reasons we are the way we are goes back to some event that may have happened years ago. This event may be unknown to our conscious mind. If this is true for you, you need to release it. You also may need to give yourself permission to change.

Permission to change

Our minds are amazing. They do all sorts of things to protect us. We may not remember certain events because our mind says that memory just hurts our heart. Forget about it. Sometimes we get thoughts and ideas that help us.

If your mind has shielded you somehow and this is blocking your transformation, you need to give your self permission to change. Why? Well, your mind has worked really hard to do what it thought was best for you. To give you what  it thought you wanted.  It may take a little convincing that change is OK.

When you make the diagnosis of  what you want to change, and have a plan on how to make that change. a tool that may want to consider is hypnosis to give you permission to change.

Yeah!

Smile for me.

Lisa Y coaching

www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

Communicate to prevent misunderstanding

Hey Boss!

How are you?

Misunderstanding

Misunderstanding often comes from the lack of knowledge. How many times are people hurt or angry because they do not know the whole story? A woman I know has been brought to tears day after day because she thought someone was not caring about their feelings. Why don’t they care, she asked? She thought someone was not being nice to her. But what she just recently found out is that the person was doing their best under the circumstances. They were unemployed. Yep.

So now she feels bad for being so upset. But I tell her don’t beat your self up. It isn’t your fault you were so angry. With the knowledge you had, you had every right to be angry. If you had been told the whole story, you would have known the other person was struggling too.

Tell the whole story and release the tension. 

Be aware of how your actions are impacting the lives of other people. If your actions are causing grief for others and you don’t want to do that, then talk. This woman I was helping, told her friend how hurt she was. And yet the friend just let her be hurt and angry with her. I find this baffling. Why would you let someone be hurt? Why would you hurt yourself by having someone be so angry with you?

If you really care about others, don’t let them be hurt. If the woman who was unemployed just told her friend she was unemployed, that would have eased all the tension. They were both feeling frustrated, and that little bit of information would have changed everything.

Relationship Acceptance Training

One of the things that is important to me is to help people work out bad relationships. In the case of the two women in this blog, this could have been resolved really easily. It is my suggestion that they acknowledge the frustration they shared and how unnecessary it was. And move forward as better friends with open communication.

But some relationship issues are a lot more complicated. Some take accepting others as they are. It also takes finding the good in the other person. It takes understanding the other point of view. Why is that so important? Why does that flip them out? What may be nothing to you is huge to them.

The answer lies in what makes them tick. There are 4 survivor needs. When you understand your top need and their top need then you can have understanding and work things out.

If you are in a long term relationship, and have an ongoing battle and would like to resolve it, let me know.

Reconcile. Accept. Together.

Yeah!

Smile for me.

Lisa Y coaching.

www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

Judgmental of self and judgement of others

Hey Boss!

How are you today?

Self judgmental

It seems to me that no one is more judgmental of us than we are. Some of us do that all on our own. Some of us do that because of our upbringing. If you have parents who are very demanding, you may not ever feel as if you are quite living up to expectations. What ever the reason, self judgement has a big impact on our lives.

Trying to live up to certain expectations is a lot of pressure. And when you don’t meet those expectations, disappointment and guilt rise up. When that happens one of two things can happen. You either try harder or you give up.

If you work harder, you are putting a lot of stress on yourself. If you give up, your guilt also grows. Then some spiral of unhappiness sets in. You get torn in different directions.

Judging others

When we live according to high standards, we expect others to live up to those same high standards. These standards we have for us may not even be that high, but may be higher than other people have. Sometimes higher standards are from the way people used to be. Maybe we think a hand shake should be good enough. That is, some of us, myself included, know that our handshake is a solid deal, but other people don’t abide by a written agreement. We may be willing to do things for family and friends without thinking about it, but get disappointed when others don’t return the favor.

When you have standards that others don’t meet, you get disappointed. You may have your feelings hurt. You get confused. But we can’t expect others to do as we would do. Just because you would remember something your customer told you, you can’t expect an employee at a business to give you the same attention. You can’t expect people to help you the way you would help you. You can’t expect others to go above and beyond the norm just because you would. Everyone has their own level of standards, and you can’t think of them as bad people. They just have different standards.

Be less self judgmental and

 you will be less judgmental toward others (and happier)

So, what to do? You can’t go around being upset with others for being different. They don’t mean to hurt you. Some have different priorities. What they think is important, is different than what you think is important. If something would not be important to them, they don’t think it is important to you will either. Some times they may not even notice at all that this is important to you. That is really frustrating, isn’t it. You may wonder how they just don’t respond to this urgent and/ important thing? Am I right?

Well, the world is our mirror. And maybe, just maybe you are being too hard on others because you are too hard on yourself. Just because it is natural for you to help others the way you do, it may not be for most other people. Just because you would give more customer service than you received, for example, it does not mean you received poor customer service. It may be that you got bad service or it may be that you expect more based on your own standards.

The point is maybe you expect too much because you put so much out there and don’t get a return in kind. Maybe you need to lower your expectations a smidgen. Maybe? I know it is not easy. But try. As my grandmother used to say, don’t expect much and you won’t be disappointed. Yes, people should do their best. Maybe those who disappoint you are doing their best.

Sounding board

What everyone needs is a sounding board. Do you know someone who is not so expecting of such high standards as you? If so, ask him or her if you are being unreasonable.

Shoulder to lean on

Everyone also needs a shoulder to lean on. If you are feeling let down by others because they are not treating you the way you would treat them find someone to lean on. It is always easier for someone else to put things in perspective than you can do yourself.

If you need to talk about any of this, let me know. 

If you could use a neutral third person to be your sounding board or shoulder to lean on, it would be my pleasure to be there for you.

Message me at www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

Yeah!

Smile for me!

Lisa Y coaching.

Happy Birthday…Happy New Year!

Hey Boss!~

So, I want to get right to it. Today is my birthday! Yeah!

Happy New Year!

I want to share with you my tradition. Unlike most everyone else, I make my “New Year” resolutions on my birthday instead of for January 1st. Why? Well, because it is my new year.

My resolutions. 

My resolutions are to help, truly help, 52 people this year. Help. I love to give safety and helpful tips. I love to give inspiration, no matter how small. I love to give words of encouragement. I love to give friendship and hope. But I am here to transform lives. It is my resolution to help 52 people answer that burning question. Get on the right path and stay there until the end goal is met.

I knew when I was 4 years old that this was my calling. So, that is why I am here. I am here to give gifts to the world. I want to be a friend to those who need change. I want to be a friend to those in pain. I want to be a friend to those who are sad or even depressed. I want to be a friend to those who are alone. I want to be a friend to those who have ruined or who have a relationship of any sort with someone who has turned their life upside down because of drugs or alcohol I also want to be a friend to someone who wants to share good news.

If you want to help me to meet my goals, start by messaging me here www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

Today

So, today is my birthday. So, I may not be working much today. My sister lives 2 hours away, and she and her husband are taking me out to the casino! Yeah! That is gift enough, but I know she has some other gift. No matter how many times I tell her no gifts she still does it. Oh well, I still love her and she loves me.

Normally, I have you smile for me, but it’s  my birthday so wish me luck at the casino. Thanks.

Lisa Y life coaching