Category: Uncategorized

Day 12

Focus.

I think one of the hardest things to do in modern life is to focus. We have so many of our own personal things going on. Plus, there is this enormous amount of information at our finger tips on the internet. That information gives us all sorts of thoughts.

A big change I have made in the last few months is to stop paying so much attention to all those Facebook posts. The information was overwhelming,  a little depressing and most stressful. I just had to cut it way down. Otherwise, I would think about all those things all day.

Sometimes I think we would be happier if we did not have quite so much information. I know people who have cut Facebook completely off as it was too much. I know people who have never been on it. I like seeing what my friends are doing, the cute videos, and such, but I have to keep off the “news”.

The point is that we are constantly being bombarded with information. As someone called it “noise”.

All this noise makes it hard to focus. It is a distraction.

It seems to me that in today’s world we need to learn to think without all that noise. This is why yoga classes and meditation time is growing.

Live in the moment.

I know. You have heard that before. It isn’t easy. We have a long list of things to do. But the best way to get all those things done is focus. Focus on one thing at a time.

Take the first thing on your list. Do it. Focus on that item. Now, move on to the next. When you start a task, don’t think about anything else but finishing that task. Don’t multi-task. Why? Because you lose focus.

Think about long distance runners.

I am not a runner. But I watch runners. If you are one or not, have you ever watched people run? They are so intense. They are so in their own time and place. They are so in the moment or so it seems. They seem to be focused on one thing their run. Now, I could be wrong. They could be thinking about all the other things they have to do that day. But it seems they are focused.

Most athletes seem to be in their zone. They have one task at that moment, and that is all.

Focus.

Improvement.

Perfection.

Finish. 

If we all tackle any “to do list” item the same way, we would really thrive. We would get those things on our list done. They not only would be done they would be done well and efficiently. Providing more time for other things or just relaxing.

So, the challenge for you is to focus on one thing at a time. While you do your activity think about finishing. Don’t think about rushing through though. That is a whole different mind set. No, the idea here is to focus on the task at hand, doing it well, and getting it done, but not rushing. Frankly, if you concentrate on the task at hand and not 100 other things, you will be surprised how quickly you will actually finish.

Cheers!

Coach

www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

 

Detachment

Detachment. 

Sometimes we get so involved in a situation we can’t think clearly. If something is particularly stressful, baffling, frustrating, the way to handle it is to step back from it.

Maybe you have to “count to ten”. Maybe you have to take a breath or ten. Maybe you need to take a walk. What ever it is you do to calm down do that. By withdrawing from intense emotional energy, you gain calm energy. And it is calm energy that gives you clear thinking. Things are never as bad once you calm down as they are when you are in the midst of mental breakdown, right? Getting calm brings solution.

Once you detach, the issue has no control over you. You are now in control. When you stand back, you become objective. 

Tip: is to think of it happening to someone else. I do this all the time. When I have a problem or issue and I feel bad, confused, baffled, frustrated, I ask me what would I tell someone else to do? Frankly, it is easier to solve someone else’s problems then your own. Why? Because we have a different perspective. We are not in the midst of the issue. We are on the outside looking in to someone else’s life. You do that all the time. So, do it for you. Look at your life objectively.

What do you want?

In this situation, what do you want? What outcome do you want? How do you want it to end? How do you want it to be resolved? Detach and dream of the ideal outcome. Now, what does it take to have that?

Step by step what do you need to do? The answer is in you. Remember, what would you tell someone else in the same situation, facing the same questions? And if you need help, ask someone. Let someone who is detached help. They can point you in the right direction.

Breathe. It is OK.

Coach

www.facebook.com/lissayliecoach

Day 11

Today is more of a motivator day.

Do this for you. What ever your project or goal is do it for you. Don’t do it for others. Even if others benefit from your actions, do it for you. Do it for the glory of the accomplishment.

Success. People define success in different ways. If you ask people what success is  an answer could be a career. It could be making a certain amount of money. It could be building your own business. It could be raising happy and well adjusted children. who are making a success out of their lives. It could be losing weight. It could be running a marathon.

To me, success is accomplishing what you set out to do. So, it could be any and all of the above.

Measure success in your own terms. Don’t measure it by what others think is successful. We have different dreams. Success is meeting your dreams not someone else’s dreams. Do it for you. 

Allow the change. Do you realize that sometimes people are afraid of having the goal or accomplishment they seek?  Sometimes people don’t feel they deserve that good thing. They don’t deserve to have a good career, able to wear smaller clothes, or to have a mate for life or what ever it is they are seeking.

I know that sounds crazy, but it is true. That may actually be true for you. I know it has been true for me. There have been things I wanted in the past that in my mind I wanted it. But in my heart, I was self-conscious. Would I actually be comfortable with ________?

You are where and how you are in life because it is where you feel comfortable. We sabotage change so often. It may be a subconscious thing, but you do. I highly suggest you take some some and meditate or do self-hypnosis and allow yourself the permission to change. Ask yourself why is this my comfort zone? And then, how can I find the same thing in a new zone?

If you get to that new zone, if you meet your needs on a higher level, how will that feel?

Once again, make small goals. Celebrate the accomplishment of each step. As your check off goals, you get closer and closer to the original big goal. This should help with feeling you are being successful.

As you check off each goal, you get farther out of your comfort zone and more comfortable in the new zone.

OK, now go out there and do it.

Coach

www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

Day 10

So, a main difference between a life coach and other counselors is the focus. We don’t look into the past unless it is absolutely relevant to the here and now.

We don’t focus on past experiences to determine future experiences. We don’t look back at childhood. We don’t look back at the last 30 or 40 years.

You may have tried to do certain things in the past and did not succeed in accomplishing your goal. Or maybe you started something and did not finish. In the past, you may not have succeeded or finished because you did not understand your motivators. Or maybe something else became a priority. Then, by the time you got back to it, you lost momentum and it was hard to start up again.

We all do that.

Sometimes things are not gong as we had planned. Maybe it is harder than we thought. Maybe it isn’t fun anymore. Maybe we don’t get results and give up.

Here is what I say.

Forget about the past. Start again. Work on improvement. As I said before, you don’t have to do everything all at once. Take baby steps if you have to. Once you get momentum going and some success your enthusiasm and confidence will grow. You will get past your comfortable way of doing things, your old habitual way of meeting your goals, and you will get into your new way of meeting your goals. And before you know it this new habit will feel very comfortable. You will become accustomed to meeting needs on a higher level.

Here is to new habits!

Coach

www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

Day 9

Good foundation.

No matter what you do you always need a good foundation. You can’t build the second floor of a building until you have the first.

The basics.

In order to have a good foundation in any goal, you need a plan. You need a general outline of the process you are going use to meet your goal. Some people are very detailed oriented. They will be very precise on each step to take. Some people are more general in their thinking. This is good if you want a little wiggle room in the “how”. Just be sure  you have enough detail to not skip some step, and to know where you plan went accordingly and where it got off track.

A fit and healthy outcome.

Just because something looks good on the surface of things doesn’t mean it is solid inside. Don’t put up a facade do make your end result seem better than it actually is. There is some value to “fake it until you make it”. But that will only get you so far. It may get your foot in the door so to speak, but if you can’t back things up with a solid core then things can fall apart in no time. To be successful in what ever you are trying to achieve, make the core of it strong. As the saying goes, “If  you don’t have time to do it a second time, do it right the first time.” The best way to do it right the first time is to have the core healthy and the image of the thing will honestly reflect the fitness of the thing.

The perfect conditions.

More often than not people wait for things to be just right to start a thing. They want all their “ducks in a row.” The thinking is that if they get everything just right then they will be more successful when they launch their new project. But this stops so many people. Because more often than not things are rarely perfect. There is usually something that is not 100% right.

But as much as you want a great foundation and solid core, you really can’t wait for it to be “just right”. Because this is a delay tactic. This is usually fear taking over. Are you really ready to venture out of your comfort zone and put yourself out there with this new project for all the world to see?

I have never seen the conditions to be perfect. Some times are better than others. But perfect is a whole other thing. When you have things about as good as you can, go for it. Learn to adapt. Adapting is a major part of making anything happen. Sometimes you have to the best with what you have at hand.

Don’t wait.

If you really want something, the time is now. Today is the day. There may be some dragging on your part.  You are trying to do something different, and maybe it is hard. It may be scary. It may be uncomfortable because it is new.  These feelings is normal by the way.  Even the most successful people had fear of doing things they had never done before.

But one of the things highly successful have in common is wishing they had started earlier. The first steps you take in this project of yours may very well be hard. There may be hurdles. You may have to do things you don’t want to do because you are unfamiliar with them. But, once you do certain things a few times, it gets easier when your confidence builds up.

The sooner you start, the harder you work, the sooner you will reap the rewards.

Confidence.

Confidence is a funny thing. Some people have more confidence than they maybe should based on their skills and abilities. Some people do not have enough confidence based on their skills and abilities.

Confidence is important to have to try something new and out of your comfort zone. If you need to build up your confidence, here is a trick I use. What are you good at doing? What one thing in your life do you consider you really know your stuff? Well, use the confidence you have doing that to lead you in this new project.  Imagine how you feel when you do that thing you are so good at doing. Now, apply those feelings to your new project. It works. Try it.

OK, that is all for today. I hoped this gave you some positive things to consider.

Cheers!

Coach

www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

Abilities

Often when people are seeking to change their life they want to change what they do for a living. Sometimes the “what” answer is clear, and “how” is what needs to be figured out. Sometimes  “what” has to be determined first.

Where to start?

Your abilities.

What have you done in the past that had many accomplishments? What do you find rewarding? What fascinates you? What can you do for hours and hours and never tire doing? What is something you never get bored doing? What subject do you want to be an expert? What subject could you talk about with complete enthusiasm? This is where your abilities lie.

When you identify your natural ability, you thrive. You find your unique place in the world. Then the “how” will just take care of itself. All the pieces will fall in place. You will have the enthusiasm to achieve because you will love what you are doing. You will do well because you will be thirsty for knowing more and doing better and better. It will be fun. You will have your whole heart in it, and you will be unstoppable.

Seven questions:

One. What do you love?

Two. What makes you feel important?

Three. What would you like to be excellent doing?

Four. What do you do when you get the most results?

Five. What would make the biggest impact on your life?

Six. What are you excellent at doing?

Seven. What could you do all day long and not tire of it?

Do. that.

Coach

www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

Day 8

The earned reward is so sweet.

When I take on a project, I like to imagine it in my mind. I imagine how it will go. No matter the challenge I imagine it going smoothly and according to plan. But no matter the planning and ability to do the challenge something can go not according to plan. You can’t plan or imagine every possible snag.

If you are doing something you really enjoy, you won’t mind the occasional snag. Having something not be in reality as you imagined is par for the course. A snag should be a hurdle that you take in stride. You don’t really know how things will go when you are actually doing it.

You may stumble. But when you have made it over all the hurdle,  you have really accomplished something.

I do my own yard work. In the summer it is so hot. I  need a glass of water every 20 or 30 minutes. After a few hours, I am so tired. I feel like giving up sometimes. But I want to get so many tasks done so I push on.

At the end of the day, boy am I ready to relax. I have a nice cold drink. I think  about the accomplishments of the day. I smile. All your muscles seem worn out. But at the same time they are invigorated. It is what you call a good tired. I sit back and enjoy the rest. I earned it.

This is what happens when you accomplish any goal. Sometimes reaching a goal is challenging with hurdles. There are things you have to do that are not really hard, but you may not always be in the mood. But when you make it the feeling of accomplishment is so great. And when you meet the goal, you may be tired, a good tired. You have worked through the tough times and conquered. You can sit back and enjoy the benefits. You earned them.

So, let those end rewards keep you going.

Coach

www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

Day 7

Starting new things is exciting.

Have you had a job for awhile and it has become routine? It seems dull and boring. Maybe you drag yourself to work. Maybe you stop working the last five minutes as you count down the seconds until you can leave. Then, there is a new person. They come in to work all excited. First, they are glad to have a job. Second, it is all new and fresh. You look at this newbie. You smile and nod and think how long will that last? When will the newness wear off? Maybe there is even a work place pool betting on when the daily grind will take over.

That is how it is with most any new thing. You started. Maybe you did a happy dance in the kitchen. You sang your personal fight song. You feel on the top of the world. Everything you want is coming into your life.

It starts out great! You are knocking things off your to do list. But then it is getting harder. Or you hit a snag. Or have neglected other things and now you have to take care of those things. You got side tracked. Your enthusiasm is slowly fading. You realize this is happening. Now you wonder why you did that happy dance in the kitchen. This new thing, well, you pick at it like the left over turkey on Thanksgiving night. You still like it, but it isn’t what it was when you started.

What to do?

Get in the groove. Keep the momentum going. 

One of the things that will help with this is a little routine. Get in the groove. Commit to working on this new thing at the same time every day. No excuses. When you feel you are slipping and not keeping the project going, give it a shove. Keep the momentum going.  It is easier to keep anything going than to start from a stop.

Commit to others. Vow to accomplish some goal in so many days.

I love writing blog posts. I hope that just one person is inspired even a little every day. I made a commitment to make 1 post a day for 30 days on a special series of little motivators for a  transformation outline for change. This is only day 7, and I am tired of the project. I love doing it, but every day is a lot of commitment. It takes 45 minutes to an hour a day. And I don’t even know if I a reaching anyone. I assume I am reaching someone, but I am not sure. Just in case, here I am.

Do it for you.

Did you start something new to help you to grow as a person? Did you start something to turn your life around? Did you start something out of pure necessity? Just like doing something nice for others or giving a gift, don’t do it for pats on the back. Don’t expect a parade in your honor. Do it for you. The sense of accomplishment is a great thing. And when you help yourself, you really help others. But don’t get me wrong. I think that as you accomplish goals, you should celebrate because it is hard to keep going when the newness wears off or other things get in the way.

Remember, the way things are is your comfort zone. Doing something new is going out of your comfort zone. It is easy to stay comfortable. But when comfortable becomes uncomfortable and you become restless, you need to do something.

Coach

www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

 

Day 6

Hello~

Today is day 6 of the 30 day transformation plan.

Keep going.

Trying to do something new can be hard. Trying to do things differently than you did before can be hard. One minute it seems all is going well, and the next it seems so hard you wonder why you even bother. It would be so much easier to just stop.

I am thinking about riding a bicycle. It is tricky at first. You have to keep your balance. You have to ride at some minimum rate of speed to keep from tipping over. You start out with training wheels. At first you like the training wheels because they keep you from tipping over. When I was a kid with training wheels on my bike, we had a dirt driveway. At the end of the driveway was a pot hole. I used to position my bike just so and my back tire was situated somehow so that I could pedal and not go anywhere. I used to think that was great fun.

There comes a time when you don’t want your training wheels anymore. You aren’t a baby for goodness sake. When your dad comes out with the screwdriver and takes off the training wheels, that is a great feeling.

Learning to do just about anything is the same. You are out of your comfort zone. It is exciting at first. You are on a new adventure. It is sort of like dad took the training wheels off your bike and you can now explore a whole new world. But sometimes you get stuck. You may feel like you are spinning your wheels in the pot hole at the end of your comfort zone and going nowhere. But unlike when I got my bike stuck in the pot hole (which I did purposely for the fun of it) spinning your wheels in a pot hole is not fun. It is actually frustrating. You get tired trying to get going again.

You ask your self why you are doing this. It isn’t fun anymore. I don’t want to anymore. My life is just fine without this. I should just go back to where I was. Comfortable.

Well, you most certainly can do that. You can go back to your comfort zone. And if you really have learned to hate whatever it is you are trying to do that may be the answer for you. There is nothing wrong with that.

But if the quality of your life can be better by pushing through the tough times then I say keep going. The question is whether or not the rewards of pushing through are greater than not continuing. That is, are the rewards of pushing though greater than what you have if you stay in your comfort zone? For some of you, this may not be much of a question. Where you are is not good. You need to get out of your situation. You need a change.

My suggestion to you is don’t do it alone. Don’t struggle to get through the challenge alone. Share your goals and ambition with at least one other person. But make sure that person is supportive. And don’t let any past failures stop you from trying.

Just like learning to ride a bicycle, start with training wheels. Sooner or later you will get comfortable in the new zone, and you can take the training wheels off. And then you will be ready to take the next step into a new zone if you like.

Cheers.

Coach.

www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach

Day 5

This is day 5 of the #30daytransformation

How are you?

Topic for today is push yourself.

If you want to be the best you can be, you have to push yourself. It is all about going past your comfort zone and trying new things. It is about doing things you may not want to do. You do these new things to accomplish goals you to meet challenges.

Have you ever made a decision to do something then after a short time thought, “What was I thinking? This could be climbing a difficult trail which you are now stuck doing because others are expecting you to finish the hike. This could be taking a long walk, and now you are tired and have to continue on because you have no other way to get home. Could be to give up sugar. Maybe it is buying a new business or taking a new job, and you don’t know what you are doing, and what else can you do but continue.

I think about a line from the Hobbit. We must go in the direction of our greatest fear for therein lies our greatest hope. That really inspires me. Now that may be a little dramatic. I am not saying that conquering a great fear because it is  your only hope. What I am saying is that if you do something challenging, push yourself past your comfortable limits, you will find you have more ability than you thought. What a great sense of accomplishment that is.

I remember learning to walk. I remember mom getting me up after my nap and carrying me to the family room. She set me on the ground held me up to stand on my legs. On the other side of the room, maybe ten feet away was pop. He is crouched down and saying, “Come to papa.” I remember thinking I didn’t want to. Walking was hard. But I did it. Now, I don’t know if mom helped or not. But I remember crossing the room on my feet. It seemed a lot farther than the ten feet.

The point is that was out of my comfort zone of sorts. I did not give up. That may not seem like much now, but at the time it was a challenge. And I accomplished it.

I want to leave you with this one thought. Commit to yourself.  You don’t have to do anything for anyone but you. Actually, you never have to anything. But if you make a decision to do something, even if no one else knows, honor your self see the commitment to the end.

This is why maybe you don’t try to change everything in your life at once. Baby steps if you will. Make goals that are manageable. Manageable goals are easier to meet and not something you are so likely to quit. Once you accomplish one goal you can raise the bar so to speak.

Coach

www.facebook/com/lisaylifecoach