I know a woman in her 30s who tells me she is homeless and hungry. She told me the other night that she was cold and was headed to the 7 11 to beg for money for food.
Before I continue, I would like to say that she comes from what used to be a very close family. Her parents live in the most exclusive neighborhood in Orange County, CA. Her downfall is Heroine. She has been to jail a few times. She has been to rehab a few times. She has been in one of the best in the state. Her parents have paid for this rehab. One month at one was $30,000. Between you and me I don’t think one month is enough. I think it takes months of rehab to have it stick.
I have tried to counsel her. She has a cell phone and we communicate on messenger. Having a cell phone may make you think she is not homeless. But I believe it because I was told she was a year ago. I said her parents would be there for her. She said they are “tired”. They take care of her 2 year old child, and have gone through so much with her. She said they would not offer help and if they did she would not accept it.
I suggested that she has friends who will help her. Maybe they could get her a job and a place to crash. I know a year ago that is what she was doing. She was working at a friend’s business here and there and “couch surfing.” But she says she does not have any friends. Either she is lying, a strong possibility, or she does not want to accept any more “charity” from friends.
No matter what I say she really denies herself assistance. This is so baffling to me. I have never been one to ask for help. But when I have really needed it, I asked. There is a sense of being weak sometimes when you ask for help. Sometimes people feel they should be independent. But we all need someone to lean on from time to time.
We should never feel we do not deserve help. If we are homeless, a junkie, or just trying to make it through an ordinary tough time. We are all human beings. It does not make you weak. Actually, asking for help takes strength. So. if you need help, reach out and ask. It is OK.
Cheers!
Coach
www.facebook.com/lisaylifecoach