The “but” factor. I do not have magic wand that fixes issues, frankly no one does– no therapist, pastor or life coach. Nothing can happen unless you make the necessary changes and put in the work. I work for you as a guide so that YOU can work through all the confusion, blurred lines and gain clarity in order for you to achieve your goals. There are so many times that people ask for advice or want changes in their life and we get to the thought process to start the transformation and the word “but” appears.
“But”
– I want to start a new career “but”
– I want to break up because I know they aren’t right for me “but”
– I read the inappropriate text messages and/or emails “but”
– I know that I am being disrespected “but”
– I raised my children up right, yet they are being disrespectful and I know that I need to be their parent not their friend “but”
– I want to talk to my boss about… “but”
The list goes on “but” you get the point. You cannot expect change if you continuously fight reality or refuse to do the right thing. If your great gift of intuition is speaking to you, along with the other people that you asked for advice– to include myself, are telling you the same thing that your intuition told you, then it is probably time for change. When you seek guidance from others it is not because you are clueless, it is because you seek validation and approval to change your situation.
Unfortunately that hardest things to do are 99 times the right thing to do. You resist change because of your own top three selfish reasons.
The number three reason is:
– Because I DO NOT WANT TO FEEL BAD
The number two reason is:
– Because I DO NOT WANT TO LOOK BAD
The number one reason is:
– I FEEL GUILTY
Guilt is a cognitive or an emotional experience that occurs when a person realizes or believes—accurately or not—that he or she has compromised his or her own standards of conduct or has violated a moral standard, and bears significant responsibility for that violation. It is closely related to the concept of remorse.
Unless you did something morally or ethically wrong to another, there is no place for guilt. How can you justify guilt because you choose to make positive changes in your life that SOMEONE ELSE may not agree with? That is their issue, not yours. Therefore if you know it is time for a career change, a relationship change, a wake up call to your children– that will become bad adults if you do not fix it now, boundaries need to be set for disrespectful parents, family members, friends or peers, time to talk to your boss about career progression, and you CHOOSE not to take action, then do not seek help from others and do not complain.
There will be many times in life that you have to take that hard left and as always, the choice is yours.
~Empower U