Chivalry is not dead, it has just not been required

Part five of ‘dating your partner consistently’. There is nothing wrong with being a strong independent woman at work but that is exactly where it needs to be left if you expect to be treated like a lady in your relationship. I am a leader and a Soldier in the U.S. Army and I am very capable of doing things for myself, yet I am very much a lady and I am treated as such by my husband who is also a service member that is aware of all my abilities. As women you want equal pay, rights and respect at work and deservingly so because you work extremely hard and have earned those rights, however it has spilled over into your relationships and the male/female roles have been skewed.

Men today have become emasculated and confused because of the messages you send them. If you have ever said “I don’t need a man for anything, I can do it all by myself” then this is for you. Back in the day there were things that men had to do just have the privilege of taking a woman out on a date much less sleep with her. Now because you can do everything on your own, you have confused being independent with your essence and grace of being a lady and all the courting that men used to do is almost nonexistent. For the sake of our daughters in this generation you have to model to them what chivalry looks like. When my son left with his date to prom with both sets of parents watching as they went to the car, I was very pleased to see that my son opened the car door for his date and helped her and the dress into the car and closed the door for her— her father was pleased as well. I did not have to tell him to do that, it came naturally to him because that is what his father does for me.

Bring chivalry back into your relationships by allowing your partner to do some simple things like:

– Open doors for you
– Pull your chair out and wait for you to be seated before he sits
– Pay for your meals
– Help you fix your car or take it in for services and fix things around the house
– Pump the gas in your car
– Help you to put on your coat or jacket
– Hold your hand in public

The roles of men and women in relationships are not always about money and who makes more or who is most self sufficient, it’s about the value of love and respect that you place on each other that can make a huge difference. If you change your viewpoint from that of you showing weakness to you allowing your partner to adore you for the Queen that you are, then the transition will be easy. When you make these shuttle changes your partners view of you and himself tends to shift and he sees his value as your man. You cannot complain when your partner has let you down because he just wants sex or has literally screwed you and left you with a baby. If you tell him that you do not need him for anything then you cannot expect him to do anything.

Empower U and your partner, allow him to be the man in the relationship. If he does not step up to the plate then you know what you got and as always, the choice is yours.

~Empower U

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